Recently.

I have so many things to blog about right now. But it is so hard to get my thoughts in order. This has been a crazy, emotional, and incredible couple of months. So where to begin...

For one it is starting to really scare me that all of my senior friends are going to college in 9 months. I can't even explain how i feel about this. It is just so weird that all of the people i have been friends with and are normally just 15 minutes away are going to be much farther than that. And it scares me for them to be so far away. Time just flies by so fast i feel like last month i was a freshman and my biggest worry with school was there was only one cute boy at my whole school, and now here i am 16 years old and that is the least of my worries. I have to think about real things like grades. Sometimes i just wish i was 4 years old again. And as ready as i am to be a wife and a mommy one day i just wish i could freeze time for a couple months.

Another thing that has been on my mind recently was if you knew you had 24 hours to live what would you do. We had to write a paper on it Literature a couple weeks ago and at first i thought this was a really random and pointless topic. But the point was that if we would do that on our last day why are we not doing it today because we are not promised out next second. Well i thought about that a little and thought about how true that is but then i moved on. Well yesterday i was in a little wreck that was almost huge. As i was pulling out onto 150 a truck pulled my front bumper off coming from my drivers side. (Yes, it was 100% my fault.) And even though my car does not look it's best right now, i'm fine. But if i would have not seen the truck at the last second and slammed on my breaks he would have hit my drivers door going about 50 mph. (After typing that out i just sat here for 30 seconds shaking.) Even the thought scares me so bad. It showed me how fast life can be taken from you. It just takes that one mistake. So for real think about what you would do with your last day. THEN GO DO IT.

A lot more has happened through the past couple months but it's late and i need sleep. (Yes, i go to bed now. How strange.) So i will blog soon and put up some pictures.

Goodnight to all, and to all a goodnight.
(OH i'm really excited about Christmas too.)

Steadfast.

Hey friends :)

Okay this is something i really have been meaning to blog about forever and ever. But now that school is over i have absolutely no excuse to not be blogging. But what i want to say is so pure and sweet that i really can not even fathom it.

Well recently i have been OBSESSED with Psalms. I'm not sure why, but i think because it is so strait forward and there is just so much wisdom in that book. But not to long ago i was going through all the verses i have underlined (which is A LOT) but, probably 75% of them have the word 'steadfast love' in it somewhere. And the more i looked the more i realized that word is not only any the verses i underlined but it is all over the book of Psalms. Do you know what it would be like to have a steadfast love for someone because i am not sure i would.

I am a very loving person, i love people. Even if i do not necessarily like the person i can promise you i love them. I think that is one of my spiritual gifts. (I have not figured out what that means in my life yet but we'll see.) But i honestly can not imagine having a ongoing, everlasting love for someone. Because even though i really do love everyone there is probably somewhere that i would draw the line. And God does not just love us, he likes us ALL THE TIME. I really can not imagine it. And I'm not so sure about you, but i know that i do not always treat God like he deserves. I forget about Him, cheat him, and stab in the back. And i am pretty sure if i had someone do that to me i would not have a 'steadfast love' or like for that person.

So so so sweet to hear. That we are forever loved with no stop, no matter what. And i know every single person reading this loves the idea of always being loved. Well, you are. :)

This week, keep in mind how much God loves us. It just might make you change some of the ways you treat Him and your time with Him.

Last thing: My very best friend, Miss Kayla Perry is in Panama right now. She will be there for 2 and half more weeks. (17 days, but i mean who's counting?) But please keep her in your prayers. :) Thank you.

Love every single one of you.

mm. everyOUNCEofyou.

Trust Him.

So much has come to my attention lately, but tonight i just have a few things on my heart. I always have things to share going on but never actually get off my lazy butt and write them out. So I'm gonna try my best to summarize my thoughts for tonight and actually stay on track and people actually be able to understand my point. I am going to go ahead and apologize in advance for my rambling because i tend to do that a lot.

Tonight in family bible study my mom read a verse that really struck me, i have heard it several times but never really took the time to break it down. I am a very analytical person, which is both a good and bad thing. But in this situation it actually helps for me to over think. 1 Thessalonians 5:18 says "Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God by Christ Jesus for you."... So i know what you are thinking, "yeah, yeah i have heard that one a million times." But have you really thought it through? Have you thought about the fact that the things that ruin your days, and make life harder, and make you upset are something you should be thankful for? I am still fully grasping this... but it all the hard times in life lead you to where you should be. Nothing that happens to you is an mistake. Think of the very worst thing that is happening to you right now. Now remember that it is in God's plan for your life, and without that piece of your story you might not end up where you should. Where you are in life is truly God's will for your life. Do you think God is making a mistake, or something is going wrong in his eyes? Absolutely not. Not only should you accept that it is for the best but also be thankful for it. As hard as it is you must be thankful for the situation you are going through.

I challenge you this week to take a look at all the things that you view as bad things and get a new perspective. Find a reason to be thankful, find the good in the situation. Because i promise there is good there somewhere, and even if you can not see it now it is there and one day it will be clear.

Love every single one of you. :)

True love.

People fail us, over and over. And every time it happens we act SHOCKED. We get upset because we trusted that person. But, doesn't the Bible give us very clear warning that all humans will fail us. The only flawless and perfect love is the love of our Savior. The end, case closed.

No friend you will ever have or boy you will ever meet will make you happy all the time. Now, i don't know if this is true for you or not but i trust people much to easy and much to fast. It does not take a lot to gain my trust, even if i barely know you. And it actually takes a lot to loose it. I'm not sure why i am this way, it's just how God made me. So this is something i struggle with, because i forget that all people will fail me. No matter how perfect they seem, no one really is.

Now i have a pretty tight group of friends and i am more than blessed with each person in my life than i realize. I have a handful of people that i could not make it through my day without, and each of you know who you are. But even though i love these people with all of my heart, they sometimes fail me. Does that mean i love them any less? Absolutely not. It is just normally something that we have to work through, but honestly that normally makes our relationship stronger.

Even my family members fail me from time to time. Don't get me wrong i have the best family in the world but, hello they are human. What the heck can you expect... My parent always want the best for me but they do occasionally mess up. Even though my mom is literally super woman and can handle almost anything let me be the first to tell you, she does not always make you the happiest person in the world. And even my daddy occasionally makes me irritated. And trust every single one of siblings drive me insane sometimes. i love every single one of them to death, but they are not perfect.

Last but not least i epically FAIL people non stop. I fail my friends, family, even people i barely know. I am so far from perfect it is ridiculous. And no i am not a "bad kid", i grew up in church, became a Christian at a very young age, and i love the Lord with all my heart. But that does not make me any better than the people who go out and get drunk every night. I am a born sinner. I mess up and hurt the people i care about the most. But most importantly i fail my Jesus over and over. He went to some a drastic measure to save me from all of my sin. He died a REAL and brutal death on the cross. Not the little drawing of the three crosses with the sunshine we scribbled growing up, but a horrid death. And he went through blood, bruises, and gashes for me and you. Yet we fail him over and over, and all he wants is us. He wants us more than any other person will ever want us. And we cheat on him, and lie to him constantly. That is true love.

He is perfect.

We are nothing.

thankyouJESUS.

"What is man, that you make so much of him, and then you set your heart upon him" Job 7:17

"The Lord is my helper, i will not fear, what can man do to me?" Hebrews 13:6

remain in the Lord. :)

Okay, new years resolution number one: stay updated on my blog. So sorry about the blogging shortage lately, i realize it has been ridiculously too long. So much has happened since i last blogged and i have had numerous things to blog about. But i will try not to over do it on this one.

First and most importantly i have come to realize so many things in the Lord. I have discovered some bible verses that will no doubt stick with me forever. I have literally had Jesus in my face screaming "Stop drawing to others, instead of me. I am your father, the only person who is always faithful. Come to me, my child." I ignored it for a while. (you know typical human response, i got this under control thanks though." But before i knew it, i was on my face asking Jesus what i needed to do. One by one relationships began falling apart, until i realized it was because i had ignored to Lord months before when reading Bible verses like these:

"What is man, that you make so much of him, and that you set your heart on him." Job 7:17 (fave. ever.)

"The Lord is my helper, i will not fear, what can man do to me?" Hebrews 13:6 (holiness.)

I completely ignored little things like that. So God decided that he would YELL it at me by physically taking away things until i realized i needed him worse than anything. So about a month ago i had to apologize to people and God. I felt so shameful for ignoring him, and promised that i would listen next time. No matter how difficult, i was ready for what he had to say. I feel so much better after fixing things. And those verses i shared earlier will forever be in my head and heart. :)

Another cool thing that has been going on is the adoption. (not only ours). Precious little Esther is getting closer and closer. We have finished paperwork, home study, and all that jazz. And now all of the paper work is IN ETHIOPIA. We are officially on the waiting list. :) I honestly can not wait.

Also my aunt and uncle have decided to adopt for Korea, and let me be first to say she is one of the prettiest little girls i have ever seen. The story is incredible, God put everything perfectly in place for their adoption. Everything has worked out completely perfect, and i can not wait to get Daria here as well. As if our families together equaling 11 kids (soon 13) was not enough we decided to add a few more colors in :).

Keep praying for both adoptions if you do not mind.

Last thing i will mention today but FOR SURE not least is my precious friend Sydney McLemore. Probably one of the strongest people i have ever met. On november 22 she was in a terrible car accident. It was her and another precious friend Natalie Hurst. The car accident was a tragedy. And as upsetting as it is Natalie was killed in the accident. Sydney had 3rd degree burns on 18% of her body, and a broken hip. She was in the hospital for 5 weeks, and remained so strong. Not only was she dealing with physical pain but also the pain of loosing one of her best friends. Sydney is now home, and doing really well. We are all so proud of her, and she has been such an inspiration to many people. (including me. forsure) Sydney has proved that with God you can overcome anything and everything. I am more proud of her than i can even express. But please, keep her in your prayers, AND the Hurst family as they are still dealing with the loss of such a precious girl.

if you noticed all of my latest experiences have only happened because of people remaining in Lord. The Lord is the only constant person in your life. He is the only person who can be 100% positive that he will be there for you every single day of your life. So, please, take my word and remain in His.

i promise to write soon.

love yall. :)